Coulterkampf #8

On the bright side, this
week's sad story had grieving
moral fanatics.

It's no wonder: a
celebrity understands
PR funerals.

This isn't about
the theoretical. How
about a coin toss?

Mom is the strangest.
She's conditional, fleeting,
and out to teach hurt.

Someone’s at the ranch.
How to mourn full-time?
Going to stop now.

Call me relentless:
you old-fashioned, grief-stricken
dead should cheer up now.

Fortunately, some-
one’s at the reality
show. Fight back, children.

If the dead son is
firstborn, we’re sorry. Unless
we have a book deal.

I've decided I'm
not sure our policy needs to
eliminate hope.

Haiku created from Ann Coulter's August 17 column.

Coulterkampf #7

General crime, the repeal of the "fundamental right" was a dream. In retrospect, we had a pretty good idea the eating of french fries no more promotes the cause than arguing with women. I know about the interview with that guy—as the newspaper called it—and all the nasty things I've said: “Killing, murder, destruction, blah blah blah….” I deeply apologize for dismissively allowing (1) thinking and (2) chortling in private. At this point, just shut up about the people responsible.

Created from Ann Coulter's Aug. 3 column.